Showing posts with label Personal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal. Show all posts
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Friday, September 4, 2009
Swedish mystery writers
I've realized why I like Henning Mankell and Stieg Larsson so much. I have some sort of affinity with their culture and I like everything Swedish. The picture above is one of the things I like. I wonder if I can get one at IKEA.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Hiatus
As everybody must have noticed, I'm taking a vacation from my writing activities. I will be back soon.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Rest in peace, Rick
My friend's dad passed away yesterday. The man survived colon cancer and walked across America. At the end of his journey, the cancer came back. He had surgery to partially remove it and was contemplating life after colostomy.
After a month battling generalized post-surgery infection, he finally passed away yesterday at 8:50 PST. Rest in peace, Rick. I never met you but, knowing your son, you must have been a hell of a man.
Rick's adventures and the final battle can be followed here.
After a month battling generalized post-surgery infection, he finally passed away yesterday at 8:50 PST. Rest in peace, Rick. I never met you but, knowing your son, you must have been a hell of a man.
Rick's adventures and the final battle can be followed here.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
I'm back!
I decided to take a two month long vacation from writing in this blog, but I'm back and full of material. Now, if only my laziness allowed me to write...
Friday, January 23, 2009
Murphy says Happy 2009!
- Whenever I'm late for work all drivers around me start driving like assholes and it looks like they all work in ensemble to screw me over.
- Whenever I have a deadline to do something important (it goes back to my college years when I had to study for tests) all these interesting things keep popping up in my mind (like playing the guitar, watching an old episode of "Seinfeld" or simply looking for random information on random entries in Wikipedia).
- Whenever there's a good game on TV, my daughter starts acting up.
Those things kept happening to me in 2008. I hope they won't in 2009.
- Whenever I have a deadline to do something important (it goes back to my college years when I had to study for tests) all these interesting things keep popping up in my mind (like playing the guitar, watching an old episode of "Seinfeld" or simply looking for random information on random entries in Wikipedia).
- Whenever there's a good game on TV, my daughter starts acting up.
Those things kept happening to me in 2008. I hope they won't in 2009.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
It's fucking cold!
After college I spent six months in Korea re-learning the language. It was a period of partying, drinking some soju, partying some more and then drinking some more soju. Student life is fantastic in Korea (if you're not in High School) and I loved that place. Not only it was Motherland but I had some characteristics that were very attractive to several native girls. Ooo lah lah.
One night I met two of these native females for dinner and the schedule was as usual. We met at the New York Bakery in Kangnam subway station and we'd then decide where to go, what to eat and what to do next. It was cold like crazy, something in the neighborhood of -20 C (which is -4 F) and it was windy.
After the restaurant was settled we decided to walk there instead of taking a cab, and since it was cold, both girls got closer and held my arms very tight. So there was I, walking in the crowded night of Seoul, with two cute girls cuddled tight in my arms. It would have been great, but the cold didn't let me think of anything else. It was like the wind was penetrating through the seams of my coat and hitting me hard with its gelid hands!
I never felt so cold in my life.
Until now.
It's been so cold in the Seattle area (no, not -4 F) and snowing so much (what was it, 20 inches in the last week?) that my very soul is frozen.
Help!
Friday, December 12, 2008
First snow in Bellevue, WA
At 10:00 PM of Friday, December 12th, it's snowing for the first time this winter. It's beautiful but I hope it doesn't stick.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Christmas lights and other nuisances
Yesterday I finally caught a break from the rain (it's not a myth, it rains 9 months a year in the Seattle area!) and managed to install the Christmas lights in our house. I'd like to thank whoever created this tradition of stapling wired lights outside your house during the winter. My frozen hands would like to thank your ass for that.
Anyway, after going through the motions and spending half an hour on top of the roof wondering if I would be increasing the statistics of males who get hurt performing this annual obligation, I declared my part was done and was prepared to connect the electricity. There would be no problems like in Christmases past because my experience made me test all segments of the icicle lights beforehand and throw away the defective ones. So I called my daughter and my wife and connected the lights.
Not one but three segments were defective and had parts on it where the bulbs didn't light up! How can this happen? Why did these lights fail when they were tested and worked perfectly just 15 minutes before? Why is a man supposed to risk his neck going up the roof twice to perform one job? And why do they send us spare bulbs if it's nearly impossible to remove the defective one without breaking the socket? And why, after you successfully replaced a defective bulb, the part that wasn't lighting on still doesn't light on?
I was so pissed off I started yelling in the middle of the afternoon. "Fuck these Chinese people and their fucked up products!". This wasn't cool for two reasons. First, I don't know if the lights were made in China (it was probably Malaysia or Vietnam, but who can tell the difference between gooks?) and second, there are lots of Chinese people in our neighborhood. But, being Asian myself, I say stuff like that without fear of physical repercussions. Plus, if things get hot, I can just go ahead and pretend I'm Chinese. People may find it hard to believe due to the obvious differences between Chinese and Korean (Koreans are way better looking), but I only have to practice my morning "Ni-hao" and that will be alright.
Anyway, at that point I was so pissed with the Chinese (hey, at least they're not Filipino, right?) that I decided we needed Japanese food. I always thought the Japanese to be the mildest of the Asians and maybe their flavorless food would help calm down my anti-Asian disposition. Those chinks delivered. The food was fantastic, although one of the courses wasn't all that Japanese.
I was feeling much better after dinner when my wife informed me it was time for our one year old tradition of building the gingerbread house. She had gotten one of those kits from Toys 'r' Us and we were ready to replicate the picture in the box!
Needless to say, the house didn't turn out like the one above. The icing provided in the kit is too hard so it's difficult to spread, making decorating the house like the picture virtually impossible. At the end of it, my daughter looked like a snowman, so much icing she had over herself and if I could absorb sugar through the skin I'd have gained 5 pounds.
Looking back, it was a fun day altogether and, jokes with my fellow Asians aside, we learned some valuable lessons. First, don't ever use icicle lights to decorate your house. Those things have a failure rate that's too high no matter where they were produced. Second, make your own icing when decorating the gingerbread house. Third, any time spent doing Christmas'y things with your family is fun.
And, to end this on an even more Christmas'y note, my daughter created a new song while we were working on the gingerbread house, sung to the rhythm and melody of "Jingle Bells": Gingerbread, gingerbread, ginger all the way! O what fun it is to build a gingerbread today, hey!
Creative, isn't she?
She got it from her daddy.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Freedom
A long time ago in a country far far away (Brazil) I was in a bus on a rainy summer afternoon. It wasn't rush hour so it wasn't completely packed, but it was slowly getting there. I managed to find a seat, settled down and opened a book, pretending to be busy while waiting for my stop to come.
It was hot and humid inside that bus and I was starting to get a little uncomfortable. That's when it happened. There was this girl seated about 10 feet away, but in a seat that faced me. As I said previously, the bus wasn't completely packed yet so we had a clear vision of each other. Our eyes met and it was one of the worst sensations in my life. She was the ugliest girl I'd ever seen in my life and I couldn't stop looking at her!
After a few minutes, I was sick and felt like throwing up. Seriously, it was the worst case of motion sickness I would ever experience in life (well, up to this point, at least). In an herculean effort, I managed to get off the bus (three stops before mine!) before throwing up on the sidewalk.
I'm not sure what exactly caused that, but I have a pretty strong suspicion that that girl's ugliness had a lot to do with it. In the same way somebody smoking a cigar by my side would bother me a lot, that girl bothered me so much that I had to get off that fucking bus three stops before mine and puked on the sidewalk.
Which takes me to the following question: why is it that, in the US of A, authorities make laws against smokers but don't make any against ugly people? And what about fat people? And smelly people? Have you ever, like I have, been so bothered by an ugly person to the point of throwing up? Have you ever, like I have, been on a plane and the person next to you was so fat that you were uncomfortable for the whole nine fucking hours? Have you ever, like I have, been in a movie theater and the person next to you smelled so bad that you had to watch the next session because the room was packed?
Don't get me wrong here. First, I'm not a smoker and second, I'm not suggesting there should be a law against ugly, fat or smelly people in public spaces. What I'm saying is that this persecution of smokers is ridiculous and unfair. I even understand the smoking ban in restaurants, but in bars? Bars, for God's sake? What's next, are they gonna outlaw nudity in strip clubs?
That's it, if banning smoking in bars is reasonable, banning nudity in strip clubs is also reasonable. They said they banned smoking in bars to protect the health of bartenders, waiters and waitresses. What about the rights of a strip club's staff member who's offended by nudity? Who protects those people?
It was hot and humid inside that bus and I was starting to get a little uncomfortable. That's when it happened. There was this girl seated about 10 feet away, but in a seat that faced me. As I said previously, the bus wasn't completely packed yet so we had a clear vision of each other. Our eyes met and it was one of the worst sensations in my life. She was the ugliest girl I'd ever seen in my life and I couldn't stop looking at her!
After a few minutes, I was sick and felt like throwing up. Seriously, it was the worst case of motion sickness I would ever experience in life (well, up to this point, at least). In an herculean effort, I managed to get off the bus (three stops before mine!) before throwing up on the sidewalk.
I'm not sure what exactly caused that, but I have a pretty strong suspicion that that girl's ugliness had a lot to do with it. In the same way somebody smoking a cigar by my side would bother me a lot, that girl bothered me so much that I had to get off that fucking bus three stops before mine and puked on the sidewalk.
Which takes me to the following question: why is it that, in the US of A, authorities make laws against smokers but don't make any against ugly people? And what about fat people? And smelly people? Have you ever, like I have, been so bothered by an ugly person to the point of throwing up? Have you ever, like I have, been on a plane and the person next to you was so fat that you were uncomfortable for the whole nine fucking hours? Have you ever, like I have, been in a movie theater and the person next to you smelled so bad that you had to watch the next session because the room was packed?
Don't get me wrong here. First, I'm not a smoker and second, I'm not suggesting there should be a law against ugly, fat or smelly people in public spaces. What I'm saying is that this persecution of smokers is ridiculous and unfair. I even understand the smoking ban in restaurants, but in bars? Bars, for God's sake? What's next, are they gonna outlaw nudity in strip clubs?
That's it, if banning smoking in bars is reasonable, banning nudity in strip clubs is also reasonable. They said they banned smoking in bars to protect the health of bartenders, waiters and waitresses. What about the rights of a strip club's staff member who's offended by nudity? Who protects those people?
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Halloween
On Halloween night I joined some friends and we took our kids trick-or-treating. In our group, we had four princesses (Snow White, Belle, Aurora and a generic one) and two firemen and, by the end of the night, I had seen ghosts, pirates, Hogwarts students and lots of other creatures, and all of them went home with their bags full of candy.
Watching the kids get their portion of candy at each door, I couldn't help but admire the way in which people decorate their houses for this night. There were some nice ones, like a spider web made of Christmas lights or a guy who transformed his garage into a haunted house, but in only two instances I felt compelled to put my beer aside (in a plastic cup, of course) and snap a picture.
It's a pumpkin and I only took the picture above because I know how hard it is to carve something like this. Wonderful job.
Now if the picture above isn't disturbing, I don't know what is. I know it's Halloween but there should be some limits.
Watching the kids get their portion of candy at each door, I couldn't help but admire the way in which people decorate their houses for this night. There were some nice ones, like a spider web made of Christmas lights or a guy who transformed his garage into a haunted house, but in only two instances I felt compelled to put my beer aside (in a plastic cup, of course) and snap a picture.
It's a pumpkin and I only took the picture above because I know how hard it is to carve something like this. Wonderful job.
Now if the picture above isn't disturbing, I don't know what is. I know it's Halloween but there should be some limits.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
From consumer to supplier
When my wife got pregnant I was hoping for a boy. Images of me and a little kid playing catch in the backyard or eating hot-dogs at a Mariners game started to fill my mind. When he grows older, I thought, maybe we could share a beer from time to time and he would ask me questions about life and stuff. Later in life, well, maybe it would be his time to take me to Mariners games.
But it turned out to be a girl. I didn't show any disappointment to my wife, but I confess the feeling was there. After wishing for a boy for a few months, the fact that it was a girl took me by surprise and I needed sometime to get used to the idea. I had to come to peace with the notion that instead of shopping for bats and gloves I would be looking for Barbies and kitchen sets for Christmas.
When my daughter was born, though, none of that mattered. Call it paternal instinct or whatever but at the very first moment I laid my eyes on that little baby girl I knew my life had taken a complete new meaning. Somebody told me once that we only know what real love is when we have kids and I'm inclined to think that's true. My daughter changed me completely.
And after a while the realization was clear. I was way happier with a daughter than I'd ever be with a son. The way girls look at you, or the way they jump at you when you come home from work, all the kissing and cuddling, it's amazing stuff. I realized that a great part in wishing for a son had to do with traditional lines of thinking instead of my personal views or preferences. You see it all the time in several cultures (Korean included), whenever a woman gets pregnant everybody hopes it's a boy.
But it turned out to be a girl. I didn't show any disappointment to my wife, but I confess the feeling was there. After wishing for a boy for a few months, the fact that it was a girl took me by surprise and I needed sometime to get used to the idea. I had to come to peace with the notion that instead of shopping for bats and gloves I would be looking for Barbies and kitchen sets for Christmas.
When my daughter was born, though, none of that mattered. Call it paternal instinct or whatever but at the very first moment I laid my eyes on that little baby girl I knew my life had taken a complete new meaning. Somebody told me once that we only know what real love is when we have kids and I'm inclined to think that's true. My daughter changed me completely.
And after a while the realization was clear. I was way happier with a daughter than I'd ever be with a son. The way girls look at you, or the way they jump at you when you come home from work, all the kissing and cuddling, it's amazing stuff. I realized that a great part in wishing for a son had to do with traditional lines of thinking instead of my personal views or preferences. You see it all the time in several cultures (Korean included), whenever a woman gets pregnant everybody hopes it's a boy.
Remember Luca Brasi? Before sleeping with the fishes he expresses deep wishes that Don Vito's daughter's first child be a masculine child. Or something like that. And when Michael Corleone gets news of his wife's miscarriage the first thing he asks is if it was a boy. So even in this thing our ours (well, theirs), the desire for a son is a deep rooted tradition.
I've done some writing about this before but I've had my share of punani in the past. I even think I may have got some from other people's shares. Some of my friends, in one instance or another, witnessed all that and the end result is that my reputation got bloated beyond proportion and is, at least when it comes to dealing with the women folk, not very flattering. And when they found out we were having a girl it wasn't surprising to hear jokes about it. The following were actual words said or written by some of my best friends and I will discuss them individually.
(1) So you're going from consumer to supplier?
Believe it or not, this was the most popular one and was used by both men and women. I don't have anything to say about it except that most of my friends are from Brazil and there is a clear and present element of misogyny in that country, evidenced by the exposition of several female body parts (nor disassembled nor bloody, of course) in the media. By the way, I would imagine that objectifying women is a cultural trace shared by other Latin countries like Mexico, Italy or Spain.
(2) Now God will make you pay for all your wrong doings.
This one was used by friends with a sense of karma. The same ones who would say stuff like "You pay in life for what you do in life" (I don't know if my free translation adequately relates the meaning of the Brazilian saying). Brazilians have a close relationship with God and He is invoked frequently in several different situations. Professional athletes often credit God after a good performance and He is also the one who brings punishment to Brazilian kids who don't behave. These friends were sorta insinuating God would transfer punishment to my daughter for my supposedly wrong doings with girls.
(3) Aren't you afraid she may meet a guy just like you?
This was the one that made me think the most. It made me think about what I want for my daughter but also made me evaluate my past a little bit. My conclusion about my daughter is that I don't worry a bit about who she meets in the future. I know she will be capable of taking care of herself. She is such a smart girl and she will be able to judge by herself what's right or wrong. And of course, some bumps along the way will only help make her stronger. I'm as loving as any parent out there but I don't see myself as someone who will always tell her what to do. I have complete confidence in my daughter because I have complete confidence in my capacity of raising her well.
Gee, it sounds I'm a little overconfident, huh?
The evaluation of my past will have to wait for another post. I'll probably write about it (or not, I'm not sure if it's interesting enough) but I'd like to finish this one with a thought. We all know there's a double standard when it comes to promiscuous boys and girls. If a guy sleeps with a lot of women he is cool and all that, but if a girl does the same thing she is a slut. On the other hand, there's also the idea that when a guy sleeps with a girl he is taking advantage of her. There's a tendency to victimize the girl and vilify the guy.
In some cultures (Brazilian and Korean, for instance), when you say "I ate her" it means "I fucked her". The idea of aggressor and victim is obviously present. Why is that? Why is the sex act an act of aggression? And why is that women are the victims most of the times?
I've done some writing about this before but I've had my share of punani in the past. I even think I may have got some from other people's shares. Some of my friends, in one instance or another, witnessed all that and the end result is that my reputation got bloated beyond proportion and is, at least when it comes to dealing with the women folk, not very flattering. And when they found out we were having a girl it wasn't surprising to hear jokes about it. The following were actual words said or written by some of my best friends and I will discuss them individually.
(1) So you're going from consumer to supplier?
Believe it or not, this was the most popular one and was used by both men and women. I don't have anything to say about it except that most of my friends are from Brazil and there is a clear and present element of misogyny in that country, evidenced by the exposition of several female body parts (nor disassembled nor bloody, of course) in the media. By the way, I would imagine that objectifying women is a cultural trace shared by other Latin countries like Mexico, Italy or Spain.
(2) Now God will make you pay for all your wrong doings.
This one was used by friends with a sense of karma. The same ones who would say stuff like "You pay in life for what you do in life" (I don't know if my free translation adequately relates the meaning of the Brazilian saying). Brazilians have a close relationship with God and He is invoked frequently in several different situations. Professional athletes often credit God after a good performance and He is also the one who brings punishment to Brazilian kids who don't behave. These friends were sorta insinuating God would transfer punishment to my daughter for my supposedly wrong doings with girls.
(3) Aren't you afraid she may meet a guy just like you?
This was the one that made me think the most. It made me think about what I want for my daughter but also made me evaluate my past a little bit. My conclusion about my daughter is that I don't worry a bit about who she meets in the future. I know she will be capable of taking care of herself. She is such a smart girl and she will be able to judge by herself what's right or wrong. And of course, some bumps along the way will only help make her stronger. I'm as loving as any parent out there but I don't see myself as someone who will always tell her what to do. I have complete confidence in my daughter because I have complete confidence in my capacity of raising her well.
Gee, it sounds I'm a little overconfident, huh?
The evaluation of my past will have to wait for another post. I'll probably write about it (or not, I'm not sure if it's interesting enough) but I'd like to finish this one with a thought. We all know there's a double standard when it comes to promiscuous boys and girls. If a guy sleeps with a lot of women he is cool and all that, but if a girl does the same thing she is a slut. On the other hand, there's also the idea that when a guy sleeps with a girl he is taking advantage of her. There's a tendency to victimize the girl and vilify the guy.
In some cultures (Brazilian and Korean, for instance), when you say "I ate her" it means "I fucked her". The idea of aggressor and victim is obviously present. Why is that? Why is the sex act an act of aggression? And why is that women are the victims most of the times?
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Love part II: Brief MK story
In this post, I had written about MK, the first girl I fell in love with. Well, this is the story of how destiny gave me at least a small reward for all those years of unreciprocated love.
When I say unreciprocated it kinda sounds like she rejected me, but it was even more pathetic than that. I never told her how I felt and she probably never suspected anything. We were friends and that was all. Actually I don't even know if she considered me a friend. I was about one year younger than her and since girls mature at a faster pace than boys she probably saw me as a little brother. That's a Korean thing.
It was my first year in college and I hadn't seen or talked to MK for a long time. I was actually already interested in the girl I would fall for and date for a while (KK) but we hadn't hooked up yet. Well, I ran into MK in a club where Korean-Brazilian students were gathered for their "first-years introduction yearly party", or whatever it was the excuse older male students had to make to get to know the newest crop of young girls. MK was a sophomore in another school and she looked prettier than I ever remembered.
My feelings for her didn't come back like in romantic comedies. As I said before I already had KK in my mind. But I was still a man. And everybody knows men are like every male in any species in nature. We want to spread the joy to as many females as we can. More than that though, I think I wanted to prove to myself I could have her if I wanted to.
I asked her to dance a slow one and she said yes. I don't remember what we talked about during that dance, but I remember I had an erection (no, I'm not a pervert, but come on, 18 year old boys will get a boner if they hug a light pole). She was nice enough not to say anything (Is that an anaconda in your pants or are you just happy to see me?) about my overexcited buddy and by the end of the song we were making out.
It feels like this story is building up to a night of passionate love or at least a quickie in the club restroom but none of that happened. We retreated to a quiet corner of the club and kissed some more and that was it. The kissing was great, she had these thick lips and it was great to finally kiss her, after all those years wanting to do it.
I don't know if I was too innocent or if I was too into KK, but I never pursued anything more with MK after that night. A few months later I was happily dating KK and loving every moment of it (although she was - and still is, according to what they tell me - a bitch).
But that night with MK was special because it transformed me. I made my bones that night. From then on I knew I could close a girl if I wanted to. And that knowledge would change my life completely.
Short comments:
(1) KK was also in the club that night. I'm starting to look real bad here.
(2) I realize this post is very misogynistic. I'm talking about girls as if they were objects. Well, I hate to break it to any girl out there but that's how guys feel and talk when you're not around.
(3) Why am I using initials instead of their real names? It's not likely they will ever read this.
(4) Since then I changed a lot. I am now a happily married man and proud father of a 4 year old girl.
When I say unreciprocated it kinda sounds like she rejected me, but it was even more pathetic than that. I never told her how I felt and she probably never suspected anything. We were friends and that was all. Actually I don't even know if she considered me a friend. I was about one year younger than her and since girls mature at a faster pace than boys she probably saw me as a little brother. That's a Korean thing.
It was my first year in college and I hadn't seen or talked to MK for a long time. I was actually already interested in the girl I would fall for and date for a while (KK) but we hadn't hooked up yet. Well, I ran into MK in a club where Korean-Brazilian students were gathered for their "first-years introduction yearly party", or whatever it was the excuse older male students had to make to get to know the newest crop of young girls. MK was a sophomore in another school and she looked prettier than I ever remembered.
My feelings for her didn't come back like in romantic comedies. As I said before I already had KK in my mind. But I was still a man. And everybody knows men are like every male in any species in nature. We want to spread the joy to as many females as we can. More than that though, I think I wanted to prove to myself I could have her if I wanted to.
I asked her to dance a slow one and she said yes. I don't remember what we talked about during that dance, but I remember I had an erection (no, I'm not a pervert, but come on, 18 year old boys will get a boner if they hug a light pole). She was nice enough not to say anything (Is that an anaconda in your pants or are you just happy to see me?) about my overexcited buddy and by the end of the song we were making out.
It feels like this story is building up to a night of passionate love or at least a quickie in the club restroom but none of that happened. We retreated to a quiet corner of the club and kissed some more and that was it. The kissing was great, she had these thick lips and it was great to finally kiss her, after all those years wanting to do it.
I don't know if I was too innocent or if I was too into KK, but I never pursued anything more with MK after that night. A few months later I was happily dating KK and loving every moment of it (although she was - and still is, according to what they tell me - a bitch).
But that night with MK was special because it transformed me. I made my bones that night. From then on I knew I could close a girl if I wanted to. And that knowledge would change my life completely.
Short comments:
(1) KK was also in the club that night. I'm starting to look real bad here.
(2) I realize this post is very misogynistic. I'm talking about girls as if they were objects. Well, I hate to break it to any girl out there but that's how guys feel and talk when you're not around.
(3) Why am I using initials instead of their real names? It's not likely they will ever read this.
(4) Since then I changed a lot. I am now a happily married man and proud father of a 4 year old girl.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Being a sports fan in the Northwest
When Americans find out I've spent most of my life in Brazil, the first thing they ask about is soccer (the second being if I speak Spanish, which I do, you ignorant asshole, but it's not the language they speak in that country). Well, let me tell you something about soccer in Brazil.
Before anything else let's make one thing clear, it's not "soccer", dummy, it's called football because it's a sport played with the feet for about 99% of the time (unlike American football). And it's not only a sport. It's a religion. It's passion. Like one famous journalist once said, "Football is the most important thing amongst non-important things."
Everybody in Brazil has a team for which he or she will almost die for. There are several reasons why one may choose one team over another (parents and immediate family have a big influence on this) but that choice is made early in life and once made, it almost never changes.
Unlike the USA, large cities in Brazil have more than one professional football team in the major league (I will call it that because I don't want to get into the subject any deeper than it already is, discussing the division system and national and local championships). And cities like Sao Paulo (where I used to live) and Rio de Janeiro (the most beautiful place in the world if not for the dirty motherfucking slums growing like a cancer in the beautiful nature) have as many as four teams in the majors at the same time.
This leads to exacerbated rivalries within the same city and, of course, one's attachment to the team is made stronger by the proximity of rivals. Therefore, every football fan in Brazil is a passionate one. One whose mood depends a lot on the weekend football results. Their relationship with their loved team is like the one with their significant others. It's love, hate, happiness and sadness, all together, sometimes in the same match.
My team was Palmeiras, the greatest team in Brazilian history. I remember I cried like a baby when we won the Sao Paulo State Championship after 17 years without any titles. The icing on the cake was that the final match was against Corinthians, historically our most hated rival. I also cried when Palmeiras won the South American Championship in 1999. It was a wonderful game against some team from Colombia and everybody who wasn't a Palmeiras fan was rooting for the Colombians.
Even from far away, I regularly follow how my dear Palmeiras is doing. Of course I don't have the same intensity but I still get happy when they win a game, or when Corinthians or Sao Paulo (the favorite team for douche bags) lose a match.
When in Rome though...
In the Seattle area for about 7 years now, I got hooked on baseball and football (the American one). And, lucky me, the Mariners suck ever since I got here and the Seahawks, well, they're starting to suck now. Actually, I understand the only team to bring a title to Seattle were the Sonics, in 1979 (almost 30 years ago!), but to me that doesn't count much, since (a) I couldn't give a rat's ass about basketball and (b) the Sonics moved to Oklahoma last year.
Back in 2006, in SuperBowl XL, I remember telling my buddies that we should really enjoy the moment since it could be the last time in our lives we'd ever see a Seattle team in such situation. I wasn't that serious at that time but if I think about it, the possibility seems very real. The Cubs haven't won a World Series in 100 years, the Red Sox's drought lasted 86 years. It is very possible that I might not see the Mariners or the Seahawks win it all until I die!
In my opinion, we the fans are also to be blamed for the mediocrity that has victimized Seattle professional sports for such a long time. It's like we don't care. The Mariners can be 20 games out of the first place in July and the fans keep going to Safeco Field and singing "Take me out to the ball game" every 7th inning stretch, with a smile in their faces. I'm tempted to give the Seahawks a pass since they've at least been to the Super Bowl, but the Mariners just lost 100 games with a 100 million payroll! And people keep smiling! Whenever the Moose shows up in the stands at the ball park, children go and hug him and the proud parents take pictures, while drinking their $7 a bottle crappy beer. What's the reason for so much happiness??
That would never happen in Brazil, that would never happen with Palmeiras fans. Yes, we spent 17 years without a title, but those years were like hell for every player, coach or anybody who had anything to do with managing the team. We the fans let them know every game that we wouldn't accept such foolishness. We would protest in the stands, we would protest in the training centers, we would make sure they knew we were unhappy. And, I believe the percentage of Palmeiras fans decreased a lot during those years. Less fans, less revenue, it was something that everybody understood.
Sometimes, specially after a loss, the fans got so pissed off that physical altercation was iminent and the players and staff had to be protected by bodyguards to make it safely out of the ball park. Had Palmeiras had a mascot like the Moose during those years, probably that would be a very hard position to fill because people would be scared to death of being beaten up.
I'm not advocating violence here. I'm just asking Seattle sports fans to care a little bit more. As I see it, we're all pussies and this pussification is affecting our teams, mainly the Mariners. We should demand more because we deserve more. No more smiling when the team loses, not more Moose pictures, no more nicknames ending in "ie" or "y" (Jamie, Danny, Willie, Ichy, Yunny, Josie and I remember Dave Niehaus once addressing Richie Sexson as Sexie), no more singing "Take me out to the ball game" until they give us a ring!
By the way, we should get rid of Dave Niehaus and Rick Rizzs. Get us some hardcore announcers, people who will curse every time the team loses and criticize bad performance. Stop trying to see the positive side of everything (like Ichiro's 264 hits amidst another horrible season) and point out the mediocrity of our beloved Mariners.
Before anything else let's make one thing clear, it's not "soccer", dummy, it's called football because it's a sport played with the feet for about 99% of the time (unlike American football). And it's not only a sport. It's a religion. It's passion. Like one famous journalist once said, "Football is the most important thing amongst non-important things."
Everybody in Brazil has a team for which he or she will almost die for. There are several reasons why one may choose one team over another (parents and immediate family have a big influence on this) but that choice is made early in life and once made, it almost never changes.
Unlike the USA, large cities in Brazil have more than one professional football team in the major league (I will call it that because I don't want to get into the subject any deeper than it already is, discussing the division system and national and local championships). And cities like Sao Paulo (where I used to live) and Rio de Janeiro (the most beautiful place in the world if not for the dirty motherfucking slums growing like a cancer in the beautiful nature) have as many as four teams in the majors at the same time.
This leads to exacerbated rivalries within the same city and, of course, one's attachment to the team is made stronger by the proximity of rivals. Therefore, every football fan in Brazil is a passionate one. One whose mood depends a lot on the weekend football results. Their relationship with their loved team is like the one with their significant others. It's love, hate, happiness and sadness, all together, sometimes in the same match.
My team was Palmeiras, the greatest team in Brazilian history. I remember I cried like a baby when we won the Sao Paulo State Championship after 17 years without any titles. The icing on the cake was that the final match was against Corinthians, historically our most hated rival. I also cried when Palmeiras won the South American Championship in 1999. It was a wonderful game against some team from Colombia and everybody who wasn't a Palmeiras fan was rooting for the Colombians.
Even from far away, I regularly follow how my dear Palmeiras is doing. Of course I don't have the same intensity but I still get happy when they win a game, or when Corinthians or Sao Paulo (the favorite team for douche bags) lose a match.
When in Rome though...
In the Seattle area for about 7 years now, I got hooked on baseball and football (the American one). And, lucky me, the Mariners suck ever since I got here and the Seahawks, well, they're starting to suck now. Actually, I understand the only team to bring a title to Seattle were the Sonics, in 1979 (almost 30 years ago!), but to me that doesn't count much, since (a) I couldn't give a rat's ass about basketball and (b) the Sonics moved to Oklahoma last year.
Back in 2006, in SuperBowl XL, I remember telling my buddies that we should really enjoy the moment since it could be the last time in our lives we'd ever see a Seattle team in such situation. I wasn't that serious at that time but if I think about it, the possibility seems very real. The Cubs haven't won a World Series in 100 years, the Red Sox's drought lasted 86 years. It is very possible that I might not see the Mariners or the Seahawks win it all until I die!
In my opinion, we the fans are also to be blamed for the mediocrity that has victimized Seattle professional sports for such a long time. It's like we don't care. The Mariners can be 20 games out of the first place in July and the fans keep going to Safeco Field and singing "Take me out to the ball game" every 7th inning stretch, with a smile in their faces. I'm tempted to give the Seahawks a pass since they've at least been to the Super Bowl, but the Mariners just lost 100 games with a 100 million payroll! And people keep smiling! Whenever the Moose shows up in the stands at the ball park, children go and hug him and the proud parents take pictures, while drinking their $7 a bottle crappy beer. What's the reason for so much happiness??
That would never happen in Brazil, that would never happen with Palmeiras fans. Yes, we spent 17 years without a title, but those years were like hell for every player, coach or anybody who had anything to do with managing the team. We the fans let them know every game that we wouldn't accept such foolishness. We would protest in the stands, we would protest in the training centers, we would make sure they knew we were unhappy. And, I believe the percentage of Palmeiras fans decreased a lot during those years. Less fans, less revenue, it was something that everybody understood.
Sometimes, specially after a loss, the fans got so pissed off that physical altercation was iminent and the players and staff had to be protected by bodyguards to make it safely out of the ball park. Had Palmeiras had a mascot like the Moose during those years, probably that would be a very hard position to fill because people would be scared to death of being beaten up.
I'm not advocating violence here. I'm just asking Seattle sports fans to care a little bit more. As I see it, we're all pussies and this pussification is affecting our teams, mainly the Mariners. We should demand more because we deserve more. No more smiling when the team loses, not more Moose pictures, no more nicknames ending in "ie" or "y" (Jamie, Danny, Willie, Ichy, Yunny, Josie and I remember Dave Niehaus once addressing Richie Sexson as Sexie), no more singing "Take me out to the ball game" until they give us a ring!
By the way, we should get rid of Dave Niehaus and Rick Rizzs. Get us some hardcore announcers, people who will curse every time the team loses and criticize bad performance. Stop trying to see the positive side of everything (like Ichiro's 264 hits amidst another horrible season) and point out the mediocrity of our beloved Mariners.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Parenting
When I was a kid, my parents loved to say things like "When you have your own kids, you will understand" or "I hope your kids do the same things you're doing now so you will know how we feel." Of course this last one was reserved for moments when I actually screwed up bad, which happened a few more times then I care to remember.
I know Korean parents tend to be more dramatic but the funny thing is now I have a kid and now I understand. Well, she's only four and still can't go FUBAR on us. So far, everything she does is beautiful and we love every moment of it, but I still can see some traces of what I'm about to face in a few years.
For instance, when I was a kid I hated to go to bed. I'd stay up for hours after my bed time. Reading, watching TV or whatever it was that kept me awake. Sometimes my dad noticed the light under my door and crashed into my bedroom and urged me to sleep. Then I developed some other tactics to stay awake like, for instance, using a flashlight to read in bed, or squeezing a towel under my door so nobody would notice the lights were still on.
Well, my daughter hates to go to bed but since she goes to school twice a week we have to be strict in enforcing some sort of a bed time for her. It's a struggle every night and I have to ask her to "Please, go to sleep" several times before she finally does so.
One of these nights I caught her trying to fool me, coloring a book under her blankets, using a flashlight. I know it's all downhill from here...
I know Korean parents tend to be more dramatic but the funny thing is now I have a kid and now I understand. Well, she's only four and still can't go FUBAR on us. So far, everything she does is beautiful and we love every moment of it, but I still can see some traces of what I'm about to face in a few years.
For instance, when I was a kid I hated to go to bed. I'd stay up for hours after my bed time. Reading, watching TV or whatever it was that kept me awake. Sometimes my dad noticed the light under my door and crashed into my bedroom and urged me to sleep. Then I developed some other tactics to stay awake like, for instance, using a flashlight to read in bed, or squeezing a towel under my door so nobody would notice the lights were still on.
Well, my daughter hates to go to bed but since she goes to school twice a week we have to be strict in enforcing some sort of a bed time for her. It's a struggle every night and I have to ask her to "Please, go to sleep" several times before she finally does so.
One of these nights I caught her trying to fool me, coloring a book under her blankets, using a flashlight. I know it's all downhill from here...
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Korean or American?
I've already posted my ideas on racism in the USA. Actually, I linked to a post by somebody who thinks pretty much like me. Then, life in this country must be like a dream for a Korean-American, right? Since this is the least racist country in the world, this must be the best place outside of Korea for people like me to live, right?
Well, let me start by saying yes. This country is the best place for Korean-Americans to live, even better than Korea. Although I have wonderful memories of my time in the motherland I have to acknowledge that actually living there must be like hell. I really enjoyed my time in Korea because I didn't have to worry about making a living or anything like that. I was there to study Korean and to hang out, just that. It was a few months of wandering around with friends, drinking, singing in karaokes and all sorts of other entertaining activities. I didn't live in Korea, I was a visitor.
I worked for a Korean company back in Brazil. During that time we used to receive lots of visitors from our head office and I of course spent sometime talking to them. They used to tell me how competitive life is in Korea, how you have to study a lot to get in a good school and how you have to work long hours to keep your job. It makes sense, with 50 million people living in such a small peninsula, they don't have a place in the sun for everybody. You have to strive to succeed.
It's even more obvious now. If life in there wasn't unbearably competitive, why would Korea be importing mediocre Americans with a BA to teach English to their kids? Why would people spend lots of money to have their children come study here? And why would we have so many Koreans trying to move here?
I want my daughter to have a normal childhood. I don't want her to study 10 hours a day. I want her to enjoy life. So the USA is the best place to raise her. But one thing worries me these days. Should I raise her to be Korean or American?
Thinking with my heart I would love her to consider her Korean heritage a very important part of life. I don't know why it is so important for me to be Korean, but it is. It's a part of me and I can't explain how I got it. Rationally, though, why should I worry about her being Korean? Why not just raise her as what she truly is, as American as anybody born in the USA, for this is a country built by immigrants from all over the world? Why would I put this conflict in her mind while there's an easier choice?
Because she looks Korean. She doesn't look American. She's not white, she's not black, she's Asian. In every situation she is, people will always wonder where she came from, never actually accepting that she is an American, just like them.
Why is that? Why are whites and blacks accepted as Americans and we are not?
I will probably have to write more posts about this subject, just to figure it out.
Well, let me start by saying yes. This country is the best place for Korean-Americans to live, even better than Korea. Although I have wonderful memories of my time in the motherland I have to acknowledge that actually living there must be like hell. I really enjoyed my time in Korea because I didn't have to worry about making a living or anything like that. I was there to study Korean and to hang out, just that. It was a few months of wandering around with friends, drinking, singing in karaokes and all sorts of other entertaining activities. I didn't live in Korea, I was a visitor.
I worked for a Korean company back in Brazil. During that time we used to receive lots of visitors from our head office and I of course spent sometime talking to them. They used to tell me how competitive life is in Korea, how you have to study a lot to get in a good school and how you have to work long hours to keep your job. It makes sense, with 50 million people living in such a small peninsula, they don't have a place in the sun for everybody. You have to strive to succeed.
It's even more obvious now. If life in there wasn't unbearably competitive, why would Korea be importing mediocre Americans with a BA to teach English to their kids? Why would people spend lots of money to have their children come study here? And why would we have so many Koreans trying to move here?
I want my daughter to have a normal childhood. I don't want her to study 10 hours a day. I want her to enjoy life. So the USA is the best place to raise her. But one thing worries me these days. Should I raise her to be Korean or American?
Thinking with my heart I would love her to consider her Korean heritage a very important part of life. I don't know why it is so important for me to be Korean, but it is. It's a part of me and I can't explain how I got it. Rationally, though, why should I worry about her being Korean? Why not just raise her as what she truly is, as American as anybody born in the USA, for this is a country built by immigrants from all over the world? Why would I put this conflict in her mind while there's an easier choice?
Because she looks Korean. She doesn't look American. She's not white, she's not black, she's Asian. In every situation she is, people will always wonder where she came from, never actually accepting that she is an American, just like them.
Why is that? Why are whites and blacks accepted as Americans and we are not?
I will probably have to write more posts about this subject, just to figure it out.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Love
I've been known to have had some success with girls when I was younger. It's an euphemism, because I was actually a slut. I've always had mirrors available so I can't pretend that I'm extremely handsome. But, as you know, some people use their brains for science, others use it to make money, I used it to get laid. Of course I'm not an ogre and girls would often say I was kinda cute or that I had something that attracted them to me. I'm sorry if you're ugly, but it's easier to get women to sleep with you when you don't look like a troll. Unless you have a lot of money, but that's another story.
Anyway, I've had several girls in my life (before I go any further, I've been always faithful to my wife and I'm quite sure I won't sleep with anybody else for the rest of my life), some were one night stands and I don't even remember their names, others I've dated casually and others I've dated for a long time. Some of them even lasted long enough for me to refer to them as girlfriends. The point of this post is that - not counting my wife - I've been in love only four times (I know some may think four is a big number but give me a break, I started at a young age) and all of them were with Korean girls. I've liked or had some long relationships with non-Korean girls before, but real love, only with Korean girls. It may not sound strange but I have to remind you that I left Korea when I was five and until I got to college I barely had any contact with Korean girls. And even after that, you know, Korean girls only accounted for about one millionth of one percent of the population in the country I was living in, so the vast majority of my relationships and flings were with non-Korean girls.
I grew up in Brazil and in that country children start their "love life" early. I remember back in elementary school when girls used to make up couples according to who liked who. It was a little strange for me for I was a Korean boy who didn't speak Portuguese very well but it wasn't unusual to see boys and girls holding hands during recess and calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. A little kiss on the lips was very common between those early lovers but of course nobody was making out in elementary school. Making out was something I was introduced to in junior high.
I was finishing elementary school when I met my first love, and let's call her MK. I was in love with her for about 4 years and I have nothing to show for it, at least during that period (aha, a little twist of events brought us together for one night later in life). She was about one year older than me and our families used to hang out.
I met my second love, who I'll call KK, when I was finishing high school (I actually met her on the last day of our college admission test) and ooh la la, she loved me back! We went to the same school and dated for about 4 months in our freshman year. We had to break up due to external reasons (parents thought we were too young to date and Korean society in Brazil is so gossipy) and not because we stopped loving each other. Although, I believe KK started hating me (love and hate are always so close) after we broke up because I was so depressed that I started sleeping with any girl who'd open her legs to me. We barely spoke to each other during the following years together in college and I think she must have suffered a little due to my slutty self (I've heard from some acquantances that she never got married, though that may be due to the fact that she is very hard to deal with).
The third girl I was in love with was ML, and she was the one I met in Korea when I went back there to re-learn the language after college. She also loved me and it was beautiful while it lasted. We had three magical months in Korea, two years of peace in Brazil and one year when everything went down. She was so crazy about me that she decided to leave her country and come live with me in Brazil. After three years of an almost married life, I was neglecting her so much that she stopped loving me. She left me and went back to Korea, breaking my heart so bad that I though I was gonna die.
I always thought you could cure the pain of a lost love with sex and after a year or so of being a slut again I met HB. She was a work colleague who lived in USA with whom I had some work related phone calls from time to time. We began this long distance relationship and on a trip we ended up hooking up. We kept it going for a while but different life goals and the distance ended our doomed relationship. Eventhough I already had plans to move to the USA we couldn't keep the magic going. I believe she loved me back then but I'm not so sure about it now.
And these were the four girls I was in love with before my wife.
I've had some other Asian girlfriends, many of them Brazilian born Koreans, Japanese or Chinese. I've also dated white and black girls. But I never fell in love with any of them because they were lacking something to me. The girls I really loved were not only Koreans, but they also had Korean culture in them. They spoke the language, they acted Korean, they were typical Korean girls. So, what I'm thinking is that, at least for me, it's very hard to fall in love with somebody if you don't share the same cultural background.
Sometimes I felt seriously interested in a particular non-Korean girl and I even thought I could someday come to love her. But this infatuation I felt only lasted for about three months after we slept together. In some cases I kept the relationship going but I was soon feeling sorry for the girl for I knew I would never be in love with her like she was with me. I remember one girl I dated for a year. She was Brazilian born Japanese and I used to wake up in the middle of the night crying, while she was sleeping by my side, because I knew our relationship was going to end some day.
I admire people who can date successfuly outside their race and culture and I really try hard not to be racist. My sister is married to a white guy and I love him like a brother. But although she was born in Korea, she isn't culturally Korean and she never was. She's a Brazilian-American woman, there's very little of Korean in her. That's why their marriage is going well.
Actually I envy the flexibility of non-Koreans when it comes to dating. They can get along with anybody, be it white, yellow, black, brown or purple. But we Koreans are very peculiar people. We need Koreans around us to be happy. There are some things in our culture that don't translate in any other. That's why most of the marriages between typical Korean girls and non-Korean guys don't work so well. The guy may be ok with it but the girl is probably gonna miss Korean culture some day.
Korean guys usually are more attached to "being Korean" than the girls. That's why you rarely see a Korean guy married to a non-Korean girl.
Am I the only one who thinks that way?
I notice now that I didn't mention what happened between me and MK. I will leave it for another post and another day.
Anyway, I've had several girls in my life (before I go any further, I've been always faithful to my wife and I'm quite sure I won't sleep with anybody else for the rest of my life), some were one night stands and I don't even remember their names, others I've dated casually and others I've dated for a long time. Some of them even lasted long enough for me to refer to them as girlfriends. The point of this post is that - not counting my wife - I've been in love only four times (I know some may think four is a big number but give me a break, I started at a young age) and all of them were with Korean girls. I've liked or had some long relationships with non-Korean girls before, but real love, only with Korean girls. It may not sound strange but I have to remind you that I left Korea when I was five and until I got to college I barely had any contact with Korean girls. And even after that, you know, Korean girls only accounted for about one millionth of one percent of the population in the country I was living in, so the vast majority of my relationships and flings were with non-Korean girls.
I grew up in Brazil and in that country children start their "love life" early. I remember back in elementary school when girls used to make up couples according to who liked who. It was a little strange for me for I was a Korean boy who didn't speak Portuguese very well but it wasn't unusual to see boys and girls holding hands during recess and calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. A little kiss on the lips was very common between those early lovers but of course nobody was making out in elementary school. Making out was something I was introduced to in junior high.
I was finishing elementary school when I met my first love, and let's call her MK. I was in love with her for about 4 years and I have nothing to show for it, at least during that period (aha, a little twist of events brought us together for one night later in life). She was about one year older than me and our families used to hang out.
I met my second love, who I'll call KK, when I was finishing high school (I actually met her on the last day of our college admission test) and ooh la la, she loved me back! We went to the same school and dated for about 4 months in our freshman year. We had to break up due to external reasons (parents thought we were too young to date and Korean society in Brazil is so gossipy) and not because we stopped loving each other. Although, I believe KK started hating me (love and hate are always so close) after we broke up because I was so depressed that I started sleeping with any girl who'd open her legs to me. We barely spoke to each other during the following years together in college and I think she must have suffered a little due to my slutty self (I've heard from some acquantances that she never got married, though that may be due to the fact that she is very hard to deal with).
The third girl I was in love with was ML, and she was the one I met in Korea when I went back there to re-learn the language after college. She also loved me and it was beautiful while it lasted. We had three magical months in Korea, two years of peace in Brazil and one year when everything went down. She was so crazy about me that she decided to leave her country and come live with me in Brazil. After three years of an almost married life, I was neglecting her so much that she stopped loving me. She left me and went back to Korea, breaking my heart so bad that I though I was gonna die.
I always thought you could cure the pain of a lost love with sex and after a year or so of being a slut again I met HB. She was a work colleague who lived in USA with whom I had some work related phone calls from time to time. We began this long distance relationship and on a trip we ended up hooking up. We kept it going for a while but different life goals and the distance ended our doomed relationship. Eventhough I already had plans to move to the USA we couldn't keep the magic going. I believe she loved me back then but I'm not so sure about it now.
And these were the four girls I was in love with before my wife.
I've had some other Asian girlfriends, many of them Brazilian born Koreans, Japanese or Chinese. I've also dated white and black girls. But I never fell in love with any of them because they were lacking something to me. The girls I really loved were not only Koreans, but they also had Korean culture in them. They spoke the language, they acted Korean, they were typical Korean girls. So, what I'm thinking is that, at least for me, it's very hard to fall in love with somebody if you don't share the same cultural background.
Sometimes I felt seriously interested in a particular non-Korean girl and I even thought I could someday come to love her. But this infatuation I felt only lasted for about three months after we slept together. In some cases I kept the relationship going but I was soon feeling sorry for the girl for I knew I would never be in love with her like she was with me. I remember one girl I dated for a year. She was Brazilian born Japanese and I used to wake up in the middle of the night crying, while she was sleeping by my side, because I knew our relationship was going to end some day.
I admire people who can date successfuly outside their race and culture and I really try hard not to be racist. My sister is married to a white guy and I love him like a brother. But although she was born in Korea, she isn't culturally Korean and she never was. She's a Brazilian-American woman, there's very little of Korean in her. That's why their marriage is going well.
Actually I envy the flexibility of non-Koreans when it comes to dating. They can get along with anybody, be it white, yellow, black, brown or purple. But we Koreans are very peculiar people. We need Koreans around us to be happy. There are some things in our culture that don't translate in any other. That's why most of the marriages between typical Korean girls and non-Korean guys don't work so well. The guy may be ok with it but the girl is probably gonna miss Korean culture some day.
Korean guys usually are more attached to "being Korean" than the girls. That's why you rarely see a Korean guy married to a non-Korean girl.
Am I the only one who thinks that way?
I notice now that I didn't mention what happened between me and MK. I will leave it for another post and another day.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
